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<<~ wakarimasen! ~>>

Sunday, August 27, 2006

I have had enough of these motherf*ckin' snakes on this motherf*ckin' plane...

...and if I could get my motherf*ckin' hands on the motherf*ckin' idiot who came up with this motherf*ckin' idea I would wring his motherf*ckin' neck before nailing him to a motherf*ckin' crucifix. *breathes* Now, once again, Hollywood has come up with a totally insane idea. "We've already covered just about everything bad that could happen on a plane... wait... we haven't chucked snakes on a plane yet!" It's as if the writers of Lost got sick of confusing themselves with the stuff that happens on that crazy island and decided to give an aeroplane a go instead. In fact, this movie could very well serve as the prequel to Lost. It's just as crazy. Equally plotless. Makes about as much sense.

Of course, this movie has a massive cult following courtest of all the hype generated by various internet sites and Samuel L. Jackson's ego-driven rant at some award ceremony. Of course, this hype is just that. And of course, like 98% of the movies that come from Hollywood, it is utter crap. But that won't stop people watching it anyway because there are people out there who are praising this movie like there's no tomorrow. Somebody on a forum even went so far as to say it was "the greatest piece of cinema I have ever witnessed". Now, while there are some absolute shockers out there (Aeon Flux is a damn fine example) surely, there are movies out there better than Snakes On A Plane?

And while some people may argue that the film doesn't take itself too seriously and that I'm just failing to see the humour and entertainment in it because I'm a miserable sod, I'd like to point out that I do enjoy the occassional mindless movie. But there is a difference between amusingly mindless and just utterly mindless. What's next? Spiders On A Bus?

Note: it's a bad idea to bag the shit out of this movie on Bored of Studies because there are people who have poor taste in movies and these said people will call you 'pretentious fuckspores' (full marks for not resorting to the cliched 'pretentious wanker').

Monday, August 07, 2006

(Un)funny

Caveman 1: ug ug ug ug ug ug ug ug ug
Caveman 2: ug ug ug ug ug ug ug ug ug ug ug narg
Caveman 1: Don't change the subject!

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Paradox of Engineering

"The purpose of engineers is to identify problems and then solve them. However, upon closer inspection of these solutions, additional faults will be found requiring extra fixes. In turn, these latest fixes will also contain glitches and have to be solved... ... ..."
Ian 'lamb chops' Lam (3rd August, 2006)

In other words, all Microsoft products are designed by engineers.